Everyday Heros Part 2: Do you wear the “S”?
Superman/Ironman and Superwoman/Wonder Woman Syndrome
Trying to live up to the expectations of others can be hard, trying to have it all and striving for perfection can be ways people cause stress/anxiety to their bodies. I am talking about overcoming the superman and superwoman syndrome. I know as a christian we are told that all things are possible to those who believe however I also believe in balance and self care.
The Superman complex/Superwoman syndrome consists of:
High achievers
there to unrealistically high standards for yourself
can’t or won’t acknowledge a need for rest and breaks
workaholic
believe you must be “on” all the time
do whatever it takes to provide for and take care of everyone you feel responsible for
measure your self-worth in terms of productivity
believe you can be superhuman; others might not be to handle it, but you can/must
have an unhealthy sense of responsibility
experience these things in all realms of your life: work, relationships, parenting, volunteering, running your household, etc.
I and several of my family members sever from this male and female alike. I have overworked myself to the point of hospitalization. While others just need a sense of balance. There is no sense of balance, it is either one extreme yo another, no middle ground. Ask yourself do you “feel” this way?
empowered or powerless
in control ir overwhelmed
confident or inadequate
realistic in your interpretations or guilty
energized or exhausted
in a state of flow or pulled underwater
happy or unhappy
calm or anxious
This can also lead to anxiety:
persistent worry and fear
racing thoughts
anxiety attacks
fatigue
chest pain
difficulty breathing
sleep problems
self-doubt
a need for control
tension
restlessness
difficulty concentrating
I learned how to overcome trying to be perfect and learned self-care. My male family members slowed down and took better care of themselves as well. I hope this will help others who may suffer from stress, anxiety, and trying to be perfect. Here are more tips :
One self care a day
Recognize your human needs- refresh body, mind, spirit, soul
Relationship with God" John15:5 I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit. Apart from me you can do nothing."
Reveal our humanness to others; eliminate any pretense of perfection
Do our best & leave the rest to God
God is in control of our lives
We need to make ourselves accountable to trusted individuals
Go for good enough
Realize that you hurt yourself and the people around you by buying into myths of perfection
Accept that you are human and so is everyone else
Compare yourself to yourself
Reduce or cutting out the sources that try to reinforce perfectionism in you
Spending less time with nervously perfectionistic people
I also found an exercise you can do for stress and anxiety.
Stop for 10 mintues
Breathe for a solid 2 of those with your eyes closed
Next make a list of all the important areas of your life (family, job, friends, travel, etc.)
Draw a circle and divide it up like a pie chart according to how much each areas is taking up of your life
Now draw another circle and divide it up
According to how you would ideally like your to be
What do you notice? Are there certain areas that are dominating and others that are barely reflected?
Ask yourself what you could do make your actual life more like your ideal life, one action at a time.
Even in business- Business superwoman or superman, self-care is not selfish