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  • Writer's picturefrancine-houston

Everyday Héros part 2: Do you wear the "S"?

Everyday Heros Part 2: Do you wear the “S”?

Superman/Ironman and Superwoman/Wonder Woman Syndrome

Trying to live up to the expectations of others can be hard, trying to have it all and striving for perfection can be ways people cause stress/anxiety to their bodies. I am talking about overcoming the superman and superwoman syndrome. I know as a christian we are told that all things are possible to those who believe however I also believe in balance and self care.

The Superman complex/Superwoman syndrome consists of:

High achievers

there to unrealistically high standards for yourself

can’t or won’t acknowledge a need for rest and breaks


believe you must be “on” all the time

do whatever it takes to provide for and take care of everyone you feel responsible for

measure your self-worth in terms of productivity

believe you can be superhuman; others might not be to handle it, but you can/must

have an unhealthy sense of responsibility

experience these things in all realms of your life: work, relationships, parenting, volunteering, running your household, etc.

I and several of my family members sever from this male and female alike. I have overworked myself to the point of hospitalization. While others just need a sense of balance. There is no sense of balance, it is either one extreme yo another, no middle ground. Ask yourself do you “feel” this way?

empowered or powerless

in control ir overwhelmed

confident or inadequate

realistic in your interpretations or guilty

energized or exhausted

in a state of flow or pulled underwater

happy or unhappy

calm or anxious

This can also lead to anxiety:

persistent worry and fear

racing thoughts

anxiety attacks


chest pain

difficulty breathing

sleep problems


a need for control



difficulty concentrating

I learned how to overcome trying to be perfect and learned self-care. My male family members slowed down and took better care of themselves as well. I hope this will help others who may suffer from stress, anxiety, and trying to be perfect. Here are more tips :

One self care a day

Recognize your human needs- refresh body, mind, spirit, soul

Relationship with God" John15:5 I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit. Apart from me you can do nothing."

Reveal our humanness to others; eliminate any pretense of perfection

Do our best & leave the rest to God

God is in control of our lives

We need to make ourselves accountable to trusted individuals

Go for good enough

Realize that you hurt yourself and the people around you by buying into myths of perfection

Accept that you are human and so is everyone else

Compare yourself to yourself

Reduce or cutting out the sources that try to reinforce perfectionism in you

Spending less time with nervously perfectionistic people

I also found an exercise you can do for stress and anxiety.

Stop for 10 mintues

Breathe for a solid 2 of those with your eyes closed

Next make a list of all the important areas of your life (family, job, friends, travel, etc.)

Draw a circle and divide it up like a pie chart according to how much each areas is taking up of your life

Now draw another circle and divide it up

According to how you would ideally like your to be

What do you notice? Are there certain areas that are dominating and others that are barely reflected?

Ask yourself what you could do make your actual life more like your ideal life, one action at a time.

Even in business- Business superwoman or superman, self-care is not selfish

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